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Never do this!

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  • Never do this!

    Head to the bathroom to pee, go to pull out your junk and completely fail to consider that you were cutting fresh jalapenos 15 minutes prior.

    Lemme tell you ... It really really REALLY burns and it apparently takes quite a while to stop burning. When I say REALLY burns, I mean like wrap your stuff in a rag, douse it in gas and light it, level of burn. Jalapenos aren't even hot. I can only imagine (and don't want to) what a ghost pepper would feel like.

    For the record, I DID wash my hands with soap after slicing the jalapenos. Apparently, that doesn't matter.

  • #2
    I used to grow my own tabasco peppers as well as okra and several other things. For a side at dinner many nights, we'd fry up some fresh okra. One time I cut open a few little tabasco peppers to squeeze the juice out onto the okra on my plate. Well, I was not thinking, and when using my bare hands to spread the skin of the pepper after slicing it open, the juice got under my damned fingernails. So for the next 2 or 3 weeks, my fingernails burned like fire. And one time,... my balls started itching... so then my fingernails weren't the only thing burning. You may think Tabasco sauce isn't insanely hot, but let me assure you, homegrown tabasco peppers are 50x hotter than storebought ones, as are most homegrown peppers, especially if you grow them in the same spot in the same soil year after year. They spread that oil into the dirt and touching the dirt can burn a little too.


    • #3
      Yeah. Never do that! lol

      My stuff burned for like 20 minutes and this morning when I woke up and had to pee I was really apprehensive about touching it in any way. This experience has given me a temporary complex.

      I can't feel it on my hands at all. My hands are pretty hard and I guess under my fingernails are too. I would rather rub jalapeno residue directly in my eye than ever get it on my genitals again. I mean, obviously I don't want either to happen but, my point is that even my eye would be preferable to what I experienced last night.

      Water boarding, electrocution, pulling out your fingernails pbbbt rub some hot pepper oil on the junk of a terrorist and he'll be singing like a canary. He'll magically know all the details of plans that he was never even told.

      Maybe this can be the next incredibly stupid internet challenge. I heard about some really stupid people eating Tide pods. At least this won't potentially kill you, I think.
      Last edited by MadGypsy; 02-21-2018, 08:01 PM.


      • #4
        Tide pods are like the Reverse escape pods for misanthropes who hate stupid people taking up space on Spaceship Earth.
        Yeah, who needs Nukes when you can just conspire to have the idiots in your country get hooked on dumb internet challenges?