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Short Essay on Newbies 101

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  • Short Essay on Newbies 101

    [This is humor. It isn't serious.]

    A Guide To Newbies
    -------------------

    Newbies are vital for the game of Quake. We need new players to enjoy the game and participate in the action.

    Newbies are also fun to frag.

    When playing in a free for all, it is important to be aware of the newbies. If you see a newbie respawn, you can feel at liberty to try to frag the newbie with a shotgun and 5 health knowing they are used to running away from other players.

    In many free for all games, one strategy is to be very alert to where newbies are presently located.

    One particularly fun game is finding 2 newbies who are grappling each other to death. This is always fun because you can get 2 frags with 1 rocket, which is always rewarding. Often being fast at finding newbies is very important determining factor in the final score.

    Cautionary Note

    It is important to be nice to newbies and tell them "gg". With some frequency, newbies evolve quickly and may end up owning you within a few months. Therefore, it is important to make friends with the newbies as it is easier to be owned by someone who doesn't hate you and tell you that you suck.

    THE END
    Quakeone.com - Being exactly one-half good and one-half evil has advantages. When a portal opens to the antimatter universe, my opposite is just me with a goatee.

    So while you guys all have to fight your anti-matter counterparts, me and my evil twin will be drinking a beer laughing at you guys ...

  • #2
    Nice. I love it when I find two of them hooking each other to death too. I run around the level really fast whenever I kill a noob, and I often find them respawning. I just follow them around and kill them when their shield wears off.

    Comment


    • #3
      It's not nice to sit there and stare at a newbie until his 3 second spawn shield goes away, but I must admit I do it. Then again, I'll do that to a veteran player too, so really I'm not being picky.

      Respawn players are fun to find.
      Quakeone.com - Being exactly one-half good and one-half evil has advantages. When a portal opens to the antimatter universe, my opposite is just me with a goatee.

      So while you guys all have to fight your anti-matter counterparts, me and my evil twin will be drinking a beer laughing at you guys ...

      Comment


      • #4
        Noone escapes from the MONSTER. SHOW NO MERCY!!! KILL ALL NOOBS!!! KILL EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Baker
          It's not nice to sit there and stare at a newbie until his 3 second spawn shield goes away, but I must admit I do it. Then again, I'll do that to a veteran player too, so really I'm not being picky.

          Respawn players are fun to find.
          Whenever someone does that to me, I toy with them. People miss a lot when they don't expect a fight.

          Comment


          • #6
            On E1M8, if you are in the right place, use the 3 second shields to take the lava dive and get the Quad.

            In fact, I often take the lava even without the shields and use the hook to speed up the process so I am still alive.
            Quakeone.com - Being exactly one-half good and one-half evil has advantages. When a portal opens to the antimatter universe, my opposite is just me with a goatee.

            So while you guys all have to fight your anti-matter counterparts, me and my evil twin will be drinking a beer laughing at you guys ...

            Comment


            • #7
              I havn't played e1m8 for sooo long. We are totally hitting that map up on our next meeting.

              Comment


              • #8
                Isn't that Ziggurat Vertigo? EW!

                Comment

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