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Post things that you wish here and make it fun/interesting. I'll kick it off.
I wish I was married to a female Kung-Fu master of Chinese descent which, spoke terrible but decipherable English. I also wish her story was something exotic like, she grew up in a farming village that got destroyed by the Japanese, leaving her homeless and alone at a very young age. A Shaolin Monk discovered her while on a journey to meditate in the secluded peaks of some mountain and became her guardian, teaching her kung-fu. After many years she finally mastered the 13 deadly strikes. Against her Masters words she escaped into the night on a quest to avenge her family. Realizing that China had changed dramatically since she last left civilization and that she would need money to succeed in her quest, she murdered a local madame and took over the brothel.
After a few years, just as she was about to follow through with her mission, her brothel was visited by the same Japanese Generals that were responsible for the death of her family and destruction of her village. Having lived in the mountains for so long she was very familiar with different herbs and roots that were lethal to humans. She eliminated all of the Japanese party with a poisonous tea.
Unfortunately word spread fast about what had happened and she was visited by a group of Japanese military. A totally kick-ass 47 minute long fight ensued. She came out victorious but not without losing an ear, as-well-as other less gruesome injures. Realizing she couldn't stay in China she fled to the US via various shipping vessels. Having nowhere to go she spent most of her time on the rails sleeping in boxcars and stealing from small stores along the tracks. She learned some English from various other train hoppers and vagabonds along the way.
Finally her travels took her to New Orleans where she answered an ad I placed for doing my laundry. I couldn't turn her down when she said "You gimme place, I do clean." So I gave her place, she did clean and the rest is a romance novel.
I wish I was married to a female Kung-Fu master of Chinese descent which, spoke terrible but decipherable English. I also wish her story was something exotic like, she grew up in a farming village that got destroyed by the Japanese, leaving her homeless and alone at a very young age. A Shaolin Monk discovered her while on a journey to meditate in the secluded peaks of some mountain and became her guardian, teaching her kung-fu. After many years she finally mastered the 13 deadly strikes. Against her Masters words she escaped into the night on a quest to avenge her family. Realizing that China had changed dramatically since she last left civilization and that she would need money to succeed in her quest, she murdered a local madame and took over the brothel.
After a few years, just as she was about to follow through with her mission, her brothel was visited by the same Japanese Generals that were responsible for the death of her family and destruction of her village. Having lived in the mountains for so long she was very familiar with different herbs and roots that were lethal to humans. She eliminated all of the Japanese party with a poisonous tea.
Unfortunately word spread fast about what had happened and she was visited by a group of Japanese military. A totally kick-ass 47 minute long fight ensued. She came out victorious but not without losing an ear, as-well-as other less gruesome injures. Realizing she couldn't stay in China she fled to the US via various shipping vessels. Having nowhere to go she spent most of her time on the rails sleeping in boxcars and stealing from small stores along the tracks. She learned some English from various other train hoppers and vagabonds along the way.
Finally her travels took her to New Orleans where she answered an ad I placed for doing my laundry. I couldn't turn her down when she said "You gimme place, I do clean." So I gave her place, she did clean and the rest is a romance novel.