@telling myself to get my act together is an act of recognition, not motivation.
It's kind of like, as a natural mechanism, you won't want to even so much as get out of bed in the morning unless there is already something you want to do... and then that just... applies pretty much equivalently to "getting shit done" in general.
I think this is what separates the Men/Women from the Boys/Girls. You have to dig deep and override the depression and inaction that keeps you down. It literally is as simple as completely ignoring whatever you have going on internally and forcing yourself to do something no how much you don't want to do it. The funny thing is, once you do this (and especially the more you do it) all those blockers that kept you down start fading away. Sometimes this can even happen while you are in the middle of doing whatever it is that you are forcing yourself to do. It is definitely based on attitude though. If you bitch and complain and feel miserable about it from one end to the other then that's what you will be. I could give you numerous examples from my own life over the past few months. It may even be true that the last few months for me have been day followed by day of "I REALLY don't want to do or deal with ANY of this." but, I'm a stubborn S.O.B. I can dig deep and switch my "I dun wanna" with "I'm gonna get this shit the fuck over with".
Let me give you one example. I just got a new job (a really good one). For the first time in as long as I can remember I needed all the up-to-date paperwork establishing my identity in order to finalize my employment. I tried to pass off some expired stuff and replacement documents. At first it seemed like it was going to fly. It didn't.
On Thursday my mother went to the hospital. I was up all night because of this. I get a call at 8am Friday morning telling me my documents are not going to fly. I ask if we can wait til Monday to handle this. I was told "no problem". Within about 1 hour I did that whole dig deep thing and decided "I'm gonna get this shit the fuck over with". I stopped driving a while back because it made no financial sense for me to keep a vehicle. I was driving like 20 miles a week and paying like half my rent to do it. So, exhausted, I caught 2 busses home to grab some documents, caught 2 busses damn near back to where I already was to get a current ID. I then caught one bus halfway back and switched gameplans. I got on a different bus and headed to the SS office. I did my shit there flipped around the corner and caught a completely different bus to my nearest bank. Due to roadwork the end of the line was damn near a mile from my bank. I walked the rest of the way, hit the bank and used my ID to change my address at the bank. I then caught 2 busses back to the hospital.
All I needed was an ID. Do you think I wanted to spend 5 hours on busses and walking in freezing temperatures while totally exhausted with my mother potentially going to die in the hospital? No, of course I REALLY REALLY didn't want to do any of that. I could have spent nowhere near 5 hours on the bus and just got my ID which was the only thing I needed. This is an example of blockers fading away in the middle of you ignoring them. At what could have been the end of my trip I got a second wind and decided "let's just get EVERYTHING done". My round trip that day was something like 60 miles. 60 miles on city busses and foot.
The only way to get over the blockers is to completely ignore them at all costs, take your "self" shove it in an "iron box" and focus on your responsibilities, NO MATTER WHAT. NO EXCUSES. NO THOUGHTS. NO FEELINGS. There is just GO and DO. This is actually the secret to doing whatever the fuck you want in this world. If you can have confidence in yourself that at any second you can completely stop and handle your business with no regard to "want" and you KNOW undeniably that whatever it is you have to do WILL be accomplished, everything in your life becomes something that is tentative to your terms. The only thing to determine is how hardcore are you and be real honest about it. If you are so hardcore you can "last second" everything and never fail then the world is your oyster. Do whatever you want whenever you want. From there it starts working backwards from almost whatever you want whenever you want all the way down to "I can never do what I want cause there is not an ounce of get-it-done in me. My life is just idle wasted time and missed opportunities".
@I guess the problem is that I don't know what I want. And even if i did, I'd probably have an awful hard time "doing what is necessary" given the long time of not having had genuine motivation before for so long that I wouldn't know how to handle it when I were finally motivated to get shit done in general...
Write. Dream and write and focus and think and repeat. Your eraser is just as important as the writing end of your pencil. Share. Share those dreams and thoughts and ideas with other people. Especially share them with people that will tell you that you can't do it and get mad. Use that fire to prove them wrong. 10 years ago I was told there is no way I could form a paint company with no vehicle and no tools. My first job was for $19,860. I got a $2000 material deposit before I started the job and bought all the tools. I knew plenty of people with vehicles. Don't tell me "can't". I will fucking destroy you. I have a "can't" going on right now or more specifically a negativity toward an idea I have. I am going to fucking destroy. I will come out ahead.
That brings me to the final thing. Notice how I talk. I am. I will. I can. My spirit is one that refuses to acknowledge that it is even possible for it to be defeated and in the times where it does actually get defeated I spend pretty much zero time considering it. I just move on to the next I am, I will, I can. Optimism my bro. Shoot for Pluto and you will probably at least hit the Moon. If the shuttle crashes, just build a new one. Never look back or down.
I built a website in 1 month and 14 days that could easily be used as a replacement for this one. I started over TWICE. I also created 2 web apps in the process. This site can't even get colored in like 6 months. The "reason" given is "I can't", "I don't", "I'm not". There's the juxtaposition of spirit and attitudes and the difference in results. I built my site live on my domain. No private server or local host. I did it that way because my attitude was "I am going to build this so fast and so obviously moving forward that just clicking a link to the next page will reveal changes"
My message to you H1CC is to CRUSH your blockers with a spirit and drive that doesn't allow you to be blocked. Turn yourself into a wrecking ball and give yourself a push. There are people here and other places that like to assume their opinion of me isn't wasted breath. Their opinions are negative and unconstructive. Let me tell you ~ you can't be a ball of fire and never burn. The very things that someone will condemn me for are a biproduct of the spirit that keeps my head WAAAAAAY above water. What I'm trying to tell you is: The more hardcore you become, the more people will hate you, which will make you more hardcore ~ and essentially make more people hate you. The alternative is to let people crush the hardcore out of you. Never let that happen. When people swing a bat at you come back with a tank. You get to a point eventually where even your haters have to respect you. It's a long road. It's not for everybody. Personally, I would rather travel the long and hard road where I have to face and deal with everything no matter how shitty and terrible than travel the prescribed successful road that only prepares you to maintain as long as nothing dramatically changes. How many CEO's have killed themself when the shit hit the fan or chance swept everything out from under them? How many families have been destroyed over life throwing some huge curve ball? These are all people that learned to maintain or succeed as long as nothing dramatically changes. Give me whatever you got. One fucking way or another I will turn that shit around. And that's why I am a royal son of a bitch, as far I am concerned, you have to be in order to DEFINITELY survive.
Harness the powers of "Royal Son Of A Bitch". Flip on the switch of relentless determination. Run through your blockers like The Incredible Hulk. Use any and all successes as a source of power that adds to your unstoppableness. Look at every single hurdle as a battle and you are the Ultimate Warrior. Remove negative statements from your self expressions, even where the negatives ultimately denote a positive. In other words it's not ... "I won't fail" ~ it is... "I will succeed". Remove half-assed expressions too. In other words it's not... "I need to do better" ~ it is ..."I will do better", "I can do better", "I am better so, even better is just the next step."
Even if you disagree with taking this as far as I take it I can promise you that adding even some of this mentality to your "self" will make you more proactive than you are now.
This inside you. No matter what the fuck you face. Maintain it or lose it.

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